MyStory: 'I Never Accepted The Trauma Because The Society Would Have Called Me A Victim'

I was 14 years old when I went on a trip with my family, I was in a sightseeing location when 2 men attacked me and sexually molested me. They had hit my head on the rocks which resulted in the numbness of my body. I wanted to stop them from touching me but I was helpless.

I moved on with my life after this incident but I never addressed the trauma or my emotions about it. I was always a very cheerful and strong girl who stood for every person when they needed it, but I failed to support and take care of myself because I never accepted the trauma internally because the society would have called me a "victim".

When I was in the final year of my graduation, I was molested again. And this time, the pain which I had been carrying for years just got multiplied. I started occupying myself with too much work just to keep my mind busy in such a manner that I would have no time to think about the trauma or pains of my life. I couldn't sleep at nights, I could not keep myself free at any moment because I would get anxiety if I took "rest" even for a while. I kept disregarding my emotions to a point that I completely lost myself.

I had carried the pain for 7 long years and I could not share it with anyone or even accept it because of the societal stigma of victimization. I started having frequent anxiety and panic attacks and I started hallucinating to a point that at moments I could not even understand the difference in the things which I saw and the reality. My situation worsened to a point wherein I wanted to kill myself.

I quit my job and decided to come back home because I could not handle it on my own anymore. When I opened up in front of my family, I was supported by each member of my family to fight the issues which I had been suppressing. I sought professional help and was diagnosed with anxiety, panic attacks, depression, and trauma.

The journey had been a very tough one but I was very determined to not give up, I worked on myself, my beliefs, my thoughts, and finally, I was able to face my issues. Today, I am an Entrepreneur, a social activist, and also a student pursuing higher education.

I have decided to take each day bit by bit and now I am working each day to bring a better future and society for myself and each person around me. I aim to bring about a positive change in society and help people in any way that I can.

I want to spread awareness and break the stigma of society's normalized way of portraying sympathy in a toxic manner and want to highlight how empathy, support, and understanding will bring empowerment to ourselves and everyone around us.

To each person who is reading this - "You are not alone! Your issues may look huge to you right now but the day you combat them, you will realize that you are stronger than you think. Just believe in yourself. You are not a victim, You  are a fighter!"

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